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Navigating Men's Struggle with Intimacy



Intimacy is a key pillar in any relationship. Men struggle with intimacy and usually equate intimacy with sex. That is only one aspect of intimacy. Many men fear the loss of their independence in relationships, so will avoid close, intimate relationships. But in essence, true emotional closeness is about balancing the sense of yourself, while still being connected to another. So you're maintaining your own identity without losing yourself.


What are the different types of intimacy?

  • Physical intimacy- which includes sex but also hugging, kissing, snuggling.


I was recently scrolling through Instagram and I came across a post from Dr. Karen Spencer, someone I know. Her post was about hugging. “Hugging is the most beautiful form of communication that allows the other person to know beyond a doubt that they matter.”


  • Emotional intimacy- Refers to closeness where both partners in relationship feel comfortably secure and loved. There is  they open communication, trust, and the expression of emotions.


  • Experiential intimacy- Bonding with your partner over leisure activities such as a travel, hiking, dancing.


Some Reason Why Men Struggle with Intimacy.

  • Many men abandon relationships and intimacy because they fear they will lose their independence

  • Possible childhood abuse, physical or emotional trauma.

  • Low self esteem


How can you build intimacy in your relationships?


  • Take it slow, particularly in the beginning. Ease into the relationship and get to know each other.


  • Build intimacy with the easy stuff first. Initiate conversations about your life.


  • Be sensitive to each others feelings. If you're in tune with your own feelings and emotions first it will be easier for you to be sensitive toward your partners feelings. Learn to identify your emotions and feelings and then express them in a healthy way.


Trust, open communication and the appropriate expression of feelings with your partner will help establish the foundation to a healthy and fulfilling relationship. Embracing and celebrating intimacy is not a sign of weakness but rather a testament to the strength and depth of a man's character. As you break free from societal norms and redefine masculinity, may you continue to foster meaningful connections, open your heart, and build bridges to authentic, genuine connections.


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